December 10th, 2025
by David Messer
by David Messer
Day #3.
It is OK to get away!
“I think I’ll be Ok. I can make it through this holiday event, dinner with family, office party! If I have people to surround me. I can do this.” And do this you should. Surrounding ourselves with those others is a wonderful step toward healthy healing. But it’s not always that easy.
When you venture out during the Holidays, you may believe you’ll be fine. But then it hits us. I’m not OK. That memory. That unexpected feeling of being overwhelmed. “Where did that come from?” Triggers are real and we don’t often know when they will hit us! In the middle of a joyful event, “I know I need to be here, but I’m struggling right now”. Healing and hurt CAN BE HAPPENING AT THE SAME TIME.
Allowing yourself to be vulnerable is part of the healing process. You may not know how you will react unless you try! And we must try in order to heal. So….go! Give yourself permission to try, but also give yourself permission to step away if you feel overwhelmed.
Day #4:
Don’t Be Afraid To Say No
Don’t let the guilt of saying no steal the joy of the season. It’s ok to turn down an invitation to a holiday dinner or party, but don’t be so quick. Don’t let “no thank you”, be your avoidance tactic to lead you down the road to isolation. Don’t rule out the possibilities that being around those who love you the most is part of the healing process. They are there to love you through your grief. Don’t choose isolation as your first option! Maybe consider bringing those who love you to YOUR dinner, or YOUR home where you feel safe and secure!
Grief is real, but so is healing. It takes time and God wants the best for you. Let the healing begin through these Holidays. Let those who love you most…be there with you. Let the Lord who loves you most, not just be your Jesus in the manger, but the healer of your heart.
It is OK to get away!
“I think I’ll be Ok. I can make it through this holiday event, dinner with family, office party! If I have people to surround me. I can do this.” And do this you should. Surrounding ourselves with those others is a wonderful step toward healthy healing. But it’s not always that easy.
When you venture out during the Holidays, you may believe you’ll be fine. But then it hits us. I’m not OK. That memory. That unexpected feeling of being overwhelmed. “Where did that come from?” Triggers are real and we don’t often know when they will hit us! In the middle of a joyful event, “I know I need to be here, but I’m struggling right now”. Healing and hurt CAN BE HAPPENING AT THE SAME TIME.
Allowing yourself to be vulnerable is part of the healing process. You may not know how you will react unless you try! And we must try in order to heal. So….go! Give yourself permission to try, but also give yourself permission to step away if you feel overwhelmed.
Day #4:
Don’t Be Afraid To Say No
Don’t let the guilt of saying no steal the joy of the season. It’s ok to turn down an invitation to a holiday dinner or party, but don’t be so quick. Don’t let “no thank you”, be your avoidance tactic to lead you down the road to isolation. Don’t rule out the possibilities that being around those who love you the most is part of the healing process. They are there to love you through your grief. Don’t choose isolation as your first option! Maybe consider bringing those who love you to YOUR dinner, or YOUR home where you feel safe and secure!
Grief is real, but so is healing. It takes time and God wants the best for you. Let the healing begin through these Holidays. Let those who love you most…be there with you. Let the Lord who loves you most, not just be your Jesus in the manger, but the healer of your heart.
Posted in Hope & Healing
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